The Most Up-Voted Sex Questions on Reddit, Answered

PHOTO: STOCKSY

There are endless things to learn about sex, but since not everyone feels comfortable with the topic, a lot of our biggest sex questions go unanswered—or answered incorrectly. That's where Dr. Jess, Astroglide’s resident sexologist comes in. During a Reddit AMA last week, she responded to the site's most upvoted questions about sexuality. And it was pretty illuminating, both because the answers are fascinating and for what the questions say about what people are most concerned about, sex-wise. Here are some of the top-voted questions, and what Dr. Jess has to say about them:

1. "Is [it] possible to go from a 'one and done guy' to being able to have multiple orgasms?"

The most upvoted question regarded whether or not men can have multiple orgasms. And happily, the answer is yes. According to Dr. Jess, the best way for guys to optimize their chances of multiple Os is to do pelvic floor exercises and squeeze these muscles when they feel like they are about to orgasm. This has some interesting results: "While most orgasms are accompanied by ejaculation in men, it is not the sensation of fluid expulsion via spinal reflex that produces the wave of pleasure and release of sexual tension associated with orgasm," wrote Dr. Jess. "These gratifying sensations can actually be enjoyed without ejaculation in an experience often referred to as a dry orgasm." Another way to achieve the same outcome is to "edge"—stop right before you come.

Women can increase their chance of having multiple orgasms by taking a break and then engaging in a different type of stimulation after the first one.

2. "What do you think is the best way to ask your partner to try something new in bed?"

A lot of people want to add variety to the bedroom, but some are too shy to bring it up. To make the conversation more comfortable, Dr. Jess suggests using a pop culture reference to segue into it. Maybe the thing you want to try was just mentioned on a TV show you both watch, for example. If you can't think of something like that, you can say you had a dream about it (if you can't get yourself to just say it, that is—if you can, there's no reason to be embarrassed!). "It’s okay to have a laugh over sexual conversations," she added. "[It] doesn’t always have to be serious."

3. "What tips do you have to help focus and maintain even during tiring and stressful life situations?"

One Redditor said he had trouble staying in the moment during sex because so much else was going on in his life. Dr. Jess said mindfulness exercises like meditation and yoga can help with this, since it's a problem that extends beyond the bedroom. Another fun tidbit? Using a cock ring can help prevent erectile dysfunction, says Dr. Jess: "It’s more of a 'band-aid' solution, but it’s also fun and can make sex hotter!"

4. "I lost all interest in sex."

Another common issue experienced by one Redditor is loss of sexual desire in a long-term relationship. "My husband and I had only been married about a year and had had a really healthy sex life until then," the Redditor wrote. "My husband tries to be understanding, but after 6 years it's hard. It's really starting to take a toll on our marriage." Dr. Jess asked if there was a lifestyle or health change when the desire started to fade (it turns out it happened when she had kids) and suggested exercise, fantasizing, and reading erotic stories as libido-boosters.

5. "How does clitoral stimulation differ from vaginal stimulation?"

Whether or not a true "vaginal orgasm" exists is an age-old debate. And according to Dr. Jess, "they can be one in the same in some cases." Though orgasm is more common with direct clitoral stimulation, the inner clitoral tissue can indeed be stimulated through the inside of the vagina to cause an orgasm.

6. "What makes good sex?"

Someone asked the million-dollar sex question, and Dr. Jess responded with "pleasure and passion." Don't worry, she elaborated. "You can make sex pleasurable by simply asking your partner what they like. More here? Faster? Slower? Harder? Use your hands, lips, tongue, breath, and every other body part you can think of. And make sure you learn to both give and take," she advised. "You can make sex more passionate by making it part of an escape from reality. Whisper in your partner’s ear. Let them play a role they wouldn’t normally play. Weave a fantasy for them and stroke their ego. Tell them just how badly you want them (and how intensely they’re desired by others too)."

Ultimately, though, what makes for great sex depends on the person—which makes this an awesome discussion to have with your partner.

P.C: http://www.glamour.com/story/sex-questions-reddit-answered